Sexuality, interesting topic isn’t it? We were raised to believe that “good girls didn’t and only bad girl’s did” have sex, that is outside of marriage. As a result some of us in this age group have numerous hangups, are embarrassed to discuss our sexual needs and wants and feel a man must always make the first move. Way too many taboos, don’t you think?  Those of us who are comfortable within ourselves and open to expressing our sexuality can have a rich and fulfilling sex life.

I know that women over 60 are still sensual, still full of desire, still yearning for intimacy and still full of love to give.

 Women over 60 tend to have more free time at this stage of their life than they did when they were younger. Child bearing and child raising has ceased, careers are established or we are moving towards retirement or retired and we are more financial.  All of these factors tend to give us more opportunity and freedom to enjoy our relationships – whether that’s a marriage, a romantic “significant other,” or just the fun of dating new people.
 Fears and insecurities such as the “fear of pregnancy” is no longer a possibility and we tend to be more self-assured and self-confident and less concerned with body image and any perceived lumps or bumps we may or may not possess. We are also not afraid to speak up and say “Can you just move a touch to the left, right or centre” to ensure that we achieve an orgasm or more and we know we should never fake. How can a man possibly know if he is satisfying his lover if she is prone to faking?

Life experiences such as love and loss, health challenges, divorce, loss of parents, children, partners or friends will tend to create a richer emotional context for our intimate lives.  Women over 60 tend to appreciate their intimate relationships more so now then they did when they were younger.

Today there are so many ways to meet and connect with new men using modern technology. The question to be asked is this necessarily a good thing? Future blogs will discuss mine and my friends hit and miss adventures/misadventures with online dating sites and the success stories of those who have formed meaningful relationships.

All of our life experiences to date make us more rounded and interesting than we were when we were younger and this makes us more attractive to the opposite sex.

Topics for future discussion could include: How many women in long term relationships feel they are doing their duty by having sex with their partner, rather than enjoying the experience themselves. How many feel comfortable enough to initiate sex? How many think that sex equals penetrative intercourse and if this isn’t possible that their sex life is over forever? Why do some men and women in long term relationships go for months or years without any affection or intimacy? This questions brings up the issue of whether the partner who is not desirous of intimacy expects their partner to be faithful? Why does the medical profession particularly in respect to cancer treatment not consider and totally inform their patients of the affect of such treatment on their sexuality now and in the future?

Note: Please talk to your doctor about your sexual health and sexual function as part of your regular medical appointments. As we get older, there are some various physical challenges with our bodies that can affect our sexual health and enjoyment of sex. Staying in better shape as we get older is another way that will help you enjoy a healthier and happier sex life.

If you are not in a monogamous relationship and are dating new partners, be sure to use condoms and practice safe sex. Even though most women over 60 are not at risk for pregnancy, we can still be exposed to sexually transmitted infections. Be aware and fully informed in respect to STI’s, this includes what the signs are and how to do a health check on a new partner. It doesn’t mean that you are promiscious if you carry condoms in your handbag, it is better to be prepared than risk your sexual health.

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